Truth, Justice and My Say

Long ago, in the days of my youth, I fell madly in love with a book series. It was the world of Valdemar, created by Mercedes Lackey. I had been an avid Scifi/Fantasy reader for years but none had ever gripped me the way that Valdemar did. It wasn’t that the story or the writer was superior to all others. It was that I identified with the characters in the story. And when I didn’t come close to the splendor of the characters I longed to be like them.

I couldn’t help but remember my passion for this book series after attending the Breaking Dawn Release Party at Borders here in Louisville. I had many reasons for going to the party. I wanted to take pictures and blog about the event. I wanted to be able to talk to my teen patrons about the event. I wanted to see what kind of activities they did, since my library branch is doing a Vampire Masque for Teen Reads Week in October. I also wanted to see how these book release parties worked. I wasn’t able to attend any of the Harry Potter events, so I was curious.

By the time I managed to get myself together and downtown to the 4th Street Borders, I had missed most of the first hour’s activities. But all was not lost. The debate between Team Jacob and Team Edward was just getting underway. The competitors were fierce in their choice of whom Bella should choose. Nothing like a good love triangle to spice up a story! I myself was leaning toward Team Jacob, but had to admit that Team Edward had the intensity of “true love” on their side.



I was amused by the passion and fun behind the debate, but I was also impressed with the amount of thought that some of the readers had given to the problems plaguing the heroine. At one point I was jockeying for a good position, from which to take a picture, and heard an older teen comment with a sneer that “some of these people are reading way too much into the story.” On a surface level I agreed, but the humanities major in me was appalled. I don’t know that you can ever read too much into a book or a story.

The interpretation of literature is a very personal thing. It is all about how the story resonates within you. Yes, there is always the discussion of context and what the author may have been alluding to or comparing to. But more importantly there is a story and it speaks differently to each person who reads it or hears it. It is no mistake that some of the greatest thinkers of all time were avid, voracious even, readers.

While I was getting release signatures for photos, I met another photographer, Christy Bowen, who was taking pictures for her own website and for TwilightMOMS.com. She graciously offered to send me photos of the apple fanging event that I missed. Here’s one of the pics of her niece with apple in fangs.



For more of her pictures visit her website.

After the debate came the costume contest. It went well, but probably could have been a little more organized. The judging was done by crowd cheers, so it ended up being who had the most supporters present rather than who had the best costume. There was also T-shirt contest that ended up going much the same way. Kaetlin Harrison,who came in second, is featured below; and, the art on the front of her T-shirt was hand painted by her mom, Wini Harrison.



The last activity before the big "line-up" began was a toilet paper wedding gown contest. Each team received a roll of toilet paper and 10 minutes to create a wedding gown for Bella. All the teams had a great time. There were smiles and laughter all around. There was even a male "Bella", Luke Gillenwater, who bore the designing of his toilet paper gown with much grace.



Ironically, the winner of the wedding dress contest was the team that wrapped up an "Alice" from the costume contest. If you're not a Twilighter, allow me to explain the irony. Alice is all about fashion and design. So it was fitting that "Alice" a.k.a Emily Friedman was the winning bride. The outcome of the contest will be even more ironic and funny for Twilighters that have already finished Breaking Dawn.



As the wedding gown contest “wrapped” up we heard the store manager announce that it was almost midnight and people should begin to make their way to the first floor to line up. Everyone had received a numbered bracelet upon entering. We were lined up in groups during the last twenty minutes before midnight. Everyone behaved exceptionally well considering there were somewhere in the neighborhood of 200 people present.



Having my copy of the book placed in my hand at the checkout counter was like the delivery of a decadent dessert after a multi-course meal. So of course, I had to purchase the Ghiradelli Twilight Delight (Intense Dark) chocolate bar that was on display at the cash wrap.

I sauntered down Liberty Street cradling my book and chocolate, watching the influx of night life as I made my way to my car. It was just a few minutes after 12 a.m. so I thought I might try to see if I could catch the end of another book release party closer to home.

I did manage to catch a small group waiting for a ride outside of the Jefferson Mall. This group of young people had attended the Waldenbooks Release Party. They were still very excited about their evening and we talked for a half an hour or so until their ride home arrived. They said their release party had about 100 people that most of them showed up later in the evening. The best costume and make-up of the evening was Phillip. He was sporting a leather jacket, pale skin and faint "bruising" under his eyes. Unfortunately, Phillip was too shy to compete in the costume contest at Waldenbooks. But that's okay Phillip, you were still the most authentic looking vamp I saw all night.

I've been seeing this word a lot lately.  I've seen it used to describe rich people running for public office, people on welfare and, most recently in a book about raising respectful children.

The irony is that I'm cursed with a brain that allows me to see the validity in all the discussions I've read.

There are most definitely rich people who feel they are entitled to whatever they want because they have money.  The treat everything and everyone like a commodity with a price tag.  Money equals power and power corrupts.

There are definitely people on welfare who whine that they are entitled to the money that they are receiving at the expense of the hardworking people of this country.  

There are of course exceptions to both of these situations.  There are filthy rich people that live simply and practice charity.  There are people on welfare that worked hard until life handed them a raw deal.  There are young people on welfare that get the helping hand they need and rise out of poverty to become successful citizens.

The third and, for me, most intriguing entitlement is the one that is being discussed in regards to children and young adults.  I'm reading a book about how to raise respectful children in a disrespectful world.  The introduction discusses the difference between self-esteem and self-respect.  Self-esteem is all about the ego.  It is all about a sense of being special.  Self-respect is about being valuable to others in some way.

The author discuss how the mindset since the 70's has been to focus on protecting the self-esteem of the child.  Unfortunately the balance was tilted too far in favor of self-esteem and the result was a couple of generations of ego-centric Frankensteins.  We know have 30 and 20 somethings, who never learned the value of courtesy or manners, breeding an new batch of Frankensteins.

If a child is always being told they are wonderful, never harshly disciplined, always getting some sort of prize and never having to put much effort into anything, he or she will inevitably believe that the world works this way.  When they "grow up" and get out into the real world they are shaped by the false reality in which they were raised.  They don't understand why their professor, coworker, or boss doesn't treat them with respect.  They think they are being cheated if their every action isn't lauded or celebrated.  They think many things are beneath them because they are, after all, so special.

I think it is a stretch to apply it to every child or person raised after 1970 but I can see the validity of the author's arguments.

Saturday I was sitting at my desk and a little boy came in with his father.  The boy is 6 and the father is about 40ish.  The boy ran over to the children's area and wanted to get onto one of the computers.  The father told him to come along to the second floor.  Apparently father needed some reference books that were on the second floor.  The boy stomped over to the elevator muttering under his breath with his arms crossed.  The father rolled his eyes, smoothed his hair back and said not a word more as they entered the elevator.  

About 20 minutes later the same little boy runs up, slaps his hands down on the edge of my desk and starts yelling at me about the computers.  I don't mean that he was excited.  I mean that he, in all of his 3 foot glory, was trying to physically and verbally intimidate me to comply with his demands.  I looked straight at him and said with a delicately arched eyebrow, "Surely you are not speaking to me in that manner?"

He stomped away from my desk and proceeded to mutter and gesticulate while staring at a poster on the wall.  I told him that if he needed his number to get on the computer he should go get his father and we would look up his number.  He ignored me. He wasn't being particularly loud so I ignored him for the moment.  My phone was ringing and there was another patron at my desk.  As I finished with the phone and the patron at my desk, I looked up to see him grabbing a scanner off the circulation desk.  

I got out of my seat as I commanded him to put the scanner back immediately.  I then told him he needed to go back upstairs with his father.  He turned and glared at me.  Then he ran to the stairwell door, shoved it open (slamming it against the wall) and ran up the stairs.   I called the upstairs staff to let them know what had played out on the first floor.

Now for the rest of the story........this little boy used to come in frequently with his grandmother.  She is the type of person who will not raise her voice at a child, nor discipline them in any way.  She would bring her 5 year old grandson to our toddler storytimes and let him run around while a story teller was attempting to engage a large group of 2 and 3 year olds.  This 5 year old would grab toys from the toddlers and on occasion push them over.  One morning my coworker spoke some firm but reasonable words to the 5 year old about remaining seated during the story time. (Since the grandmother failed to do so)  After the storytime the grandmother had the gall to ask my coworker why she didn't like her grandson.  My coworker graciously explained that she harbored no ill feelings towards the woman's grandson, but that she was responsible for making sure she provided a safe and enjoyable environment for all the storytime participants.  The grandmother argued that I and other staff members seemed to be harsh with him as well.  My coworker pointed out that the only time he was addressed by any staff members was when he was not complying with library rules or when he was presenting a danger to himself or others.  The grandmother left in a huff and no longer brought her 5 YEAR OLD grandson to TODDLER storytime.

This child is a perfect example of the little Frankenstein's that I was referring to above.  He is totally ego-centric and is acquiring a vicious demeanor.

The author also talked about her study of a sampling of children ranging in ages from toddler to teen.  During the interview process she consistently discovered that many of these children were angry with their parents or caregivers.  The ones that were able to articulate their thoughts and feeling explained that their anger was about not being taught the proper way to act or behave.  Sometime it was a lack of rules.  Sometimes it was as simple as not being taught manners.  Sometimes it was being left to their own devices.  But they were consistently angry with the adults that were supposed to be helping them learn how to "be."

If you've only been taught to view yourself in terms of self-esteem/ego, you've never had the opportunity to acquire self-respect.  Because self-respect comes from realizing the value that you can or do have to others.  A worldview that starts with and stays on "it's all about me" can't get an accurate reflection from others because it never considers others.

Things that make you go....hmmmm

Written October 11, 2007